Tuesday, January 3, 2012

The Sudden Goliath

The last half of 2011 was difficult - in many ways. Some of the challenges were fantastic, like both of us starting new jobs on the same day. Other things were just difficult. Obviously, Piper's illness overshadowed much of the latter part of the year and we still aren't recovered from that, I don't think. Eric's Mamaw (That's Kentucky for "grandma") has been ill and frail for some time and he's made a couple trips to see her in the hospital, fearing it would be his last visit. My own grandmother lost her (second) husband and my dad ended up in the hospital just before Christmas and was diagnosed with diabetes. Piper has been quite a difficult child and both of us aren't sure what to do with her most of the time.

Leading up to Christmas we'd had a very VERY difficult weekend with the girls. We weren't looking forward to the long Christmas weekend and were certain we'd end up losing our minds. HOWEVER - our Christmas this year was the best either of us could remember. We had so much fun watching the excitement in Layla and, for me, getting to share the wonder of the birth of Jesus was absolutely priceless. She asked so many question about Jesus and also learned a couple wonderful songs at church that she'd sing repeatedly.

Fast forward to New Year's eve. Pretty uneventful. We'd had a movie date the night before and stayed home to casually watch Times Square gear up for the ball drop; but we went to bed quite early and enjoyed a nice night of sleep. New Year's day - wake up. We loved the calm of the weekend so far and we woke up happy -- feeling really good and peaceful about our lives and the day ahead Go to church.

The message was based on David and Goliath and the heart of it was that we would all face "Goliaths" in the new year. The optimisim and excitement for the new year would be interrupted at some point with a Goliath. Those Goliath moments should be seen as opportunities - as moments to get in God's word, pray, and let HIM do what He does. Use the skills, abilities, tools that we know how to weild (slingshot, anyone?) and, did I mention pray?

Near the end of the message, Eric gets a text message from his sister - "Call me ASAP." His sister and family went to Kentucky mid-week and upon seeing the text, we both thought something had happened with Mamaw- something bad, obviously. Eric went to the lobby to call his sister, while I stayed for the rest of the message, music, prayer, gifts/offerings, etc. I'm singing something about "God is Good...all the time" while I'm certain my husband is receiving word that he's lost one of the most important people in his life. The irony wasn't lost on me; but God's point was made. Eric didn't come back into the service and as I left church with everyone else, I saw him, pale-faced, standing in the lobby. It wasn't Mamaw.

Eric's dad has a number of siblings and of those, both he and Eric are closest with Jack (Jackie- pic below). Jackie had died that morning - on new year's day. Not yet 60 years old and truly a person everyone loved. Our first Goliath of the year came suddenly, at exactly 10 and a half hours into the new year.

We are in Kentucky now - packed up after church and immediately hit the road. It's a difficult trip to make and the days are hard here. Trying to get Layla to bed tonight, she picks out her stories from Mimi and Papa's bookshelves - she chooses, of all things - "David and the giant, Goliath." Really, Layla? She's never before seen the book, was in Sunday school learning something different entirely on Sunday, and I didn't know this book existed in this house, and yet, there it is.

God wants me to take notice of something.  I feel like it should be obvious - I just heard a great message on the passages from 1 Samuel 17, in fact, but I don't think I'm getting it. Is God preparing me for my own sudden Goliath? Is He calling on me to pray more, spend more time in His Word? Duh - that's what He always wants from us. But, why is He being so obvious about it this time? Have I missed other subtle nudges? Yeah - probably.

I don't make resolutions for each new year - I don't see the point; but, God is telling me to stop and make Him a priority. Stop. There are big things coming - both good and Goliath. I need to prepare. I need to be armed with God's word. I don't know what Goliaths are in my future; but, I clearly need to get in God's word, make prayer a priority - be prepared and NOT AFRAID.

New Year's resolution? Sure, why not. I resolve to be unafraid of the Goliath - sudden or otherwise.